A "victory" for abstinence-only education

Somewhere, deep inside a dark cave, there's a drawing done by ancient people depicting a story of an unwed pregnancy. Of course, Gov. Sarah Palin and other abstinence-only advocates would dismiss as irrelevant the implications of this--the fact that pregnancies out of wedlock have been occurring since man and woman discovered they could get it on, or at least since Adam and Eve took a bite out of that apple. This is the reality. Of course, reality obviously isn't really a consideration for these wackos--witness the following explanation of why the couple would have sex by a poster on another forum to which I subscribe:

they loved each other to have sex, why shouldn't they love each other to tie the knot? If there is no desire for commitment, then what they have isn't love and since there is no love, they have no business having sex and bringing a baby into the world.

That's certainly an effective way to approach the problem! Start out with a false premise--love is required to have sex. Follow that up with a ridiculous conclusion-whatever love, if any, was present allowing them to have sex is enough to sustain a marriage. Finally, give unwed teenage parents an abstinence lecture.

Naturally, the proposed answer to teen pregnancy is, what else, to get married. Why not top one of the most stressful and life-altering occurrences in a young teen's life with, you guessed it..another of the most stressful and life-altering occurrences in a young teen's life? Would someone please tell me why, other than to uphold some already obliterated facade of morality, this is the first option? If you watch the RNC, anybody present commenting on the situation feels the need to happily exclaim "And they're going to get married!" Well-intentioned people will claim that this is for the good of the child, the child needs a mom and a dad, and that the two teenagers should step up and "do the responsible thing." Folks, they've already proven they CAN'T DO THE RESPONSIBLE THING--not have sex, or at the very least, use birth control. If they can't do it once, why is the response to their mistake entering into a covenant which requires them to do the responsible thing over and over forever? Let them build up to it and if it works, then that's a beautiful thing. The child can still have two parents--they just don't have to be married at first, or if it doesn't work out, ever. This is a set-up for failure--teenage marriages are two to three times more likely to end in the first 5 years. They made a mistake--why pile it on?

In Memoriam--Keith Barnes

My high school biology teacher, Keith Barnes, passed away June 6, 2008. He was so much more than just a teacher, though. He was my good friend and probably even a mentor. I've known him since I was a little kid and he and my mother were co-workers.

Like many of his former students, Barnes was my favorite teacher. According to my grade card, he taught biology and genetics, both being studies of life. However, his teachings weren't limited to the scientific realm--he also taught us about life in a much more general sense...and he loved what he taught. That was one of his most important qualities. I think we might have had textbooks in his class, but I don't ever remember him telling us to read them. I think this was because it was important enough to him that an outdated textbook would be a failure to his students. So, the source of what he taught was always the latest article on genetic disorders or DNA replication, and the old man had it all in his head.

Barnes always made it a point to recognize the efforts of his students--how many of us did he nominate for the Who's Who Among American High Schools? He knew he ran a tough class. He was never hesitant to push us harder if he thought we were lagging, either. I'm sure every one of his students remembers a particular class when getting answers and class participation was akin to pulling teeth. Barnes was more than happy to play the dentist. He would get all riled up, possibly chucking an eraser at the chalkboard or yelling at the top of his lungs "THINK, PEOPLE!" He was never mad, he just cared that much. That caring resulted in relationships lasting well beyond high school. I can remember his annual Thanksgiving dinners when the line of alumni was 40 deep.

I don't know how many people know this, but he was one of the most charitable people I've ever known with his time. He volunteered at various times at the Nelson-Atkins Museum and Union Station. He always had the some hidden hobby or interest that would pop up and surprise you. These were all symbolic of his love of life.

Barnes probably blurred the line between teacher and student moreso than most teachers would. I mean that in this way: he was one of only two former teachers with whom I ever drank. Maybe some other teachers would frown upon drinking with their former students who are of age. Maybe you could talk to Barnes in a way that other teachers would not appreciate. Maybe, on senior skip day, he'd take those of us too goody-two-shoes to skip out to lunch despite a closed campus policy. He probably caught a little flak for these actions, but I can tell you this--I learned more from him than any other teacher I've ever had.

Most importantly, Keith was a wonderful friend to my mother. They helped eachother through the shared experience of losing a parent. They went to lunch or cultural events together at least once a month. Probably most importantly, they never passed up a chance to give eachother a little good-natured shit--in my opinion, one of the most important components of a strong friendship. He was, after all, older than dirt. Yup, had to get that last one in, my friend.

I know my mom is hurting right now. The only thing I can tell her is this:

Keith Barnes' passing saddens me deeply. I feel like I lost a member of my family. His charity, compassion, humor, enthusiasm, thirst for knowledge, belief in his students, and friendship will be missed. However, you only need to read the messages on his memorial web site to feel a little better (and keep in mind that there are hundreds more who feel the same way but maybe didn't write.) It is then you realize that he left a little piece of himself with the many family and friends he had and the students he taught, and, in that way, he'll live on for a long, long time.

Garrett Wood
Olathe South High School '95

There will be a celebration of Keith's life on Friday, June13, from 3-8pm at the Ball Conference Center, 21350 W. 153rd Street, Olathe, KS. Memorials are suggested to the Keith Barnes Educational Memorial Fund, in care of First National Bank of Olathe, P.O. Box 150 Olathe, KS 66051.